Posts tagged with Spoofs

The Hospital Manager’s Association

Top Secret – Eyes Only

The Hospital Manager’s Guide to Massaging HSMRs

Members will be aggrieved to hear that the Doctor Foster Intelligence Unit and its lottery hospital standardised mortality ratios (HSMRs) are here to stay, despite several recent papers showing the methodology to be unsound.

Members will appreciate that they supply the raw data used by Dr Foster, thus providing opportunities to ‘cook’ the figures before they are passed to Dr Foster. The Association does not condone directly tampering with the data; however, faced with the intractable use of flawed statistics, the Association does believe members are entitled to ‘game’ the system to their advantage.

GMC Revalidation pilots have started. Dr No’s agents have been secretly filming progress, and a transcript of a recent ‘revalidation event’ follows.

A Responsible Officer’s plush office suite. The RO sits at his desk, holding a long sharp pin of the type favoured by neurologists in one hand, and a wax effigy in the other. He prepares to stick the former into the latter. There is a knock on the door.

BMA Press Office

For Immediate Release

BMA Launches Sexy Doc Show

London, UK February 2010 – Britain’s leading medical association has launched a new TV series starring sexy young docs in a bid to boost trainee numbers.

Modelled on the recent BBC drama Desperate Romantics, the six part Desperate Doctors portrays junior doctor training to be a racy romp through the wards and clinics - far cry from the dull round of failed job applications and endless assessments depicted by many of today’s junior doctors.

FED UP with flagging sales, BMJ editor Fearless Godlee has revamped the boring old British Medical Journal.

She has FIRED all those tedious academics who clog the Journal with silly science.

She has TEAMED UP with Channel 4 to conduct fearless probes in Big Pharma.

Panel (left to right):

Sir Richard Blagsome: handsome, ruthless, bearded entrepreneur. Has plans to airbus patients to third word countries for major operations on the cheap.

Dr Richard “It seemed like a good idea at the time” Smith, late of the BMJ, continues to blog on the BMJ website. It now appears that his former colleagues have been having a laugh at his expense by replacing his erudite words with their own tedious scribblings.